You Might Be a Medieval Engineer If…

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– you have tried to impress a fair maiden by explaining how she can make life better for herself by making her cart easier to pull, by reducing the friction between the wooden axle and wheels, only to see her make her life easier by talking some big, stupid guy into pulling the cart for her.

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– you have ever run a benefit-cost algorithm on which calculator to buy using the calculators that are for sale.

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– you have heard someone describe, in detail, how various metals gain different properties depending on which elements are added to the production process, and your first thought was, “Cool”, and not “What a nerd”.

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– you have ever sat in a movie theater and yelled at the screen because of some logical inconsistency in the strength of a wooden or steel beam the hero was using as support for his or her person or car. (It also counts if you strongly wanted to yell but didn’t because that would be too much like public speaking, which you hate even more than the inconsistencies in the movie.)

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– you have written an equation to explain your wife’s or girlfriend’s emotions.

(As a side note: This is not a good idea.)

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– You have ever calculated the check at a restaurant to the penny, with family members.

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– when your wife was nearing the time to give birth, you already had mapped out, timed the signals on and tested the time for at least three routes to the hospital, and written a decision matrix for the best route for the time of day the labor begins.

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– you carry around any of the following in your pocket: 3 pens or pencils; a calculator; a small screwdriver set; a notebook with “cool” engineering sketches in it.

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– you have ever taken a date to a great view of a landmark bridge, not to make out, but to impress her by pointing out and explaining the structural elements included in the design.

You Might Be an Engineer If…

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– At any time in your life you would have said that your longest lasting relationship was with Ohura, 7 of 9, or T’pol.

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